So my question is this, I started talking to a guy I meet on a dating website back in late May. We had a first great date and he asked me out on a 2nd date... He went out of town at the end of June for a vacation that was planned before we meet. And I went out of town for work. He contacted me while he was out of town. He got back and we had a date on the 4th of July then we had another date on the 9th of July. We communicated every day, he travels a lot with his job. He disappeared for a week no communication ect.. he got busy with work and stuff. He reached back out and told me" that he understood if I felt like I needed to move on to a relationship with somebody who can give me a more normal relationship, I told him that I wanted us to still get to know each other (ooh this is August 9th), we hung out that night and it was good.
We communicated each day, he left for a two-week to Japan, he reached out to me each day that he was away. He got back on labor day and we saw each other that night (which was nice of him since I knew he was probably tired) I suggested that we have dinner later that week and he wanted to, but he could not do Wednesday as he had a client meeting. The week went on and I did not bring it up and he did not bring it up either. I just chalked it up to him being busy with work and catching up from being out of the office for two weeks. On that Friday we texted and talked about stuff, he told me "I would never hurt you mentally or physically" said it over and over a couple of times (ooh he is in his late 40 and divorced, no kids) I asked him if he had plans for Saturday and he said "no real plans except playing tennis" I responded "would you like to hang out a little bit?" he did not respond and I just kind of let it be.
On Saturday he touched base with me after he played tennis and he still did not mention us seeing each other. I just let it go...Sunday we communicated... Monday the 19th we communicated and where talking and he opened up to me a little bit.. we got on the conversation of cuddling (he had told me when we first started talking that he would like to have the job of longtime cuddle partner) and he goes " I have been very unattentive in that department and it might serve you better to find somebody who can be more attentive" I wrote back "is this your way of saying that you want to no longer get to know me?' and he wrote back " No.. I just know who I am" He then talked about how I should find somebody who can and is willing to spend all their free time with me and who is not selfish with their free time, he said that he is scarred from his past relationship so when he gets close he starts to push away, he told me its not me but him that he likes me. I told him how I felt, etc... He likes me but is scared I'm going to hurt him.. I did not talk to him on Tuesday, he left for a work trip on Wednesday... I gave him space and did not reach out to him at all. This past Monday I sent him a smiley face and he responded back with one. He got home yesterday and he sent me a text message last night. Before all of this, we had talked about doing stuff next month for his birthday and he wants to go on vacation and be my date for a wedding... thoughts?
Free Dating Advice From Karla
I understand the dynamic. It could be one of a few factors.